{"id":3612,"date":"2026-01-21T20:05:54","date_gmt":"2026-01-21T20:05:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/?p=3612"},"modified":"2026-01-21T20:05:56","modified_gmt":"2026-01-21T20:05:56","slug":"bylo-mi-sedmnact-kdyz-jsem-porodila-dvojcata","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/?p=3612","title":{"rendered":"Bylo mi sedmn\u00e1ct, kdy\u017e jsem porodila dvoj\u010data."},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Bylo mi sedmn\u00e1ct, kdy\u017e jsem porodila dvoj\u010data. Ten den se mi zapsal do t\u011bla d\u0159\u00edv ne\u017e do pam\u011bti. Pamatuji si ostr\u00e9 sv\u011btlo v nemocni\u010dn\u00edm pokoji, chlad kovov\u00fdch n\u00e1stroj\u016f a hlas l\u00e9ka\u0159ky, kter\u00fd se sna\u017eil zn\u00edt klidn\u011b, i kdy\u017e jsem c\u00edtila, \u017ee nic z toho klidn\u00e9 nen\u00ed. Byla jsem d\u00edt\u011b, kter\u00e9 m\u011blo d\u011bti, a sv\u011bt se v tu chv\u00edli p\u0159evr\u00e1til naruby.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"1024\" src=\"https:\/\/harcum.am\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/image-92.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3613\" srcset=\"https:\/\/harcum.am\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/image-92.png 1024w, https:\/\/harcum.am\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/image-92-300x300.png 300w, https:\/\/harcum.am\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/image-92-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/harcum.am\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/01\/image-92-768x768.png 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Je\u0161t\u011b p\u0159ed p\u00e1r m\u011bs\u00edci jsem \u0159e\u0161ila \u00fapln\u011b jin\u00e9 v\u011bci. \u0160kolu, h\u00e1dky s m\u00e1mou, kluky, kte\u0159\u00ed mi psali pozd\u011b ve\u010der. T\u011bhotenstv\u00ed p\u0159i\u0161lo ti\u0161e, skoro nen\u00e1padn\u011b, a j\u00e1 ho dlouho odm\u00edtala p\u0159ijmout. Nosila jsem voln\u00e9 mikiny, vyh\u00fdbala se zrcadl\u016fm a doufala, \u017ee kdy\u017e budu ml\u010det, probl\u00e9m zmiz\u00ed. Nezmizel. Rostl. A s n\u00edm i strach, kter\u00fd m\u011b v noci budil ze span\u00ed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Kdy\u017e mi l\u00e9ka\u0159 \u0159ekl, \u017ee \u010dek\u00e1m dvoj\u010data, rozplakala jsem se. Ne radost\u00ed, ale panikou. Dv\u011b srdce, dva \u017eivoty, dv\u011b budoucnosti, za kter\u00e9 jsem m\u011bla n\u00e9st odpov\u011bdnost, p\u0159esto\u017ee jsem sama sotva v\u011bd\u011bla, kdo jsem. Otec d\u011bt\u00ed se tv\u00e1\u0159il, \u017ee v\u0161echno zvl\u00e1dneme, ale jeho slova byla lehk\u00e1 a pr\u00e1zdn\u00e1. Brzy zmizel \u00fapln\u011b a j\u00e1 z\u016fstala sama s ot\u00e1zkami, na kter\u00e9 mi nikdo neum\u011bl odpov\u011bd\u011bt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Porod byl dlouh\u00fd a vy\u010derp\u00e1vaj\u00edc\u00ed. Bolest m\u011b rozkl\u00e1dala na kusy a j\u00e1 m\u011bla pocit, \u017ee u\u017e nem\u00e1m s\u00edlu pokra\u010dovat. Kdy\u017e se ozval prvn\u00ed pl\u00e1\u010d, nev\u011bd\u011bla jsem, co c\u00edt\u00edm. \u00daleva? Strach? Nev\u011b\u0159ila jsem, \u017ee ten zvuk pat\u0159\u00ed n\u011bkomu, koho jsem vytvo\u0159ila. A pak p\u0159i\u0161el druh\u00fd. Dva hlasy, tak mal\u00e9 a p\u0159esto tak siln\u00e9, \u017ee mi rozvibrovaly cel\u00e9 t\u011blo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Dr\u017eela jsem je v n\u00e1ru\u010d\u00ed a b\u00e1la se jich dotknout. P\u0159ipadaly mi k\u0159ehk\u00e9, jako by se mohly rozpadnout pod v\u00e1hou m\u00e9 nejistoty. D\u00edvala jsem se na jejich drobn\u00e9 obli\u010deje a hledala v nich n\u011bco zn\u00e1m\u00e9ho, n\u011bco, co by mi napov\u011bd\u011blo, jak\u00e1 m\u00e1m b\u00fdt matka. Nic jsem nena\u0161la. Jen jsem v\u011bd\u011bla, \u017ee u\u017e nikdy nebudu sama.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Prvn\u00ed t\u00fddny byly rozmazan\u00fdm sledem noc\u00ed bez sp\u00e1nku. Pl\u00e1\u010d, krmen\u00ed, p\u0159ebalov\u00e1n\u00ed, znovu pl\u00e1\u010d. U\u010dila jsem se v\u0161echno za pochodu a d\u011blala chyby, za kter\u00e9 jsem se nen\u00e1vid\u011bla. N\u011bkdy jsem bre\u010dela s nimi, sed\u011bla na podlaze kuchyn\u011b a p\u0159\u00e1la si b\u00fdt znovu sedmn\u00e1ctilet\u00e1 d\u00edvka bez z\u00e1vazk\u016f. Pak jsem se za ty my\u0161lenky styd\u011bla.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Lid\u00e9 m\u011b soudili. Pohledy soused\u016f, \u0161ept\u00e1n\u00ed ve \u0161kole, ot\u00e1zky, kter\u00e9 nebyly my\u0161len\u00e9 laskav\u011b. N\u011bkte\u0159\u00ed mi \u0159\u00edkali, \u017ee jsem si zni\u010dila \u017eivot. Jin\u00ed se sna\u017eili m\u011b litovat. Nikdo se m\u011b neptal, co c\u00edt\u00edm doopravdy. Pravda byla slo\u017eit\u011bj\u0161\u00ed ne\u017e jejich jednoduch\u00e9 soudy. Byla jsem unaven\u00e1, vystra\u0161en\u00e1, ale z\u00e1rove\u0148 jsem c\u00edtila n\u011bco, co jsem nikdy p\u0159edt\u00edm nepoznala \u2014 hlubok\u00e9, tich\u00e9 pouto.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Postupn\u011b jsem za\u010dala r\u016fst spolu s nimi. Ka\u017ed\u00fd jejich \u00fasm\u011bv mi dod\u00e1val odvahu. Ka\u017ed\u00fd mal\u00fd pokrok byl d\u016fkazem, \u017ee to mo\u017en\u00e1 zvl\u00e1dnu. Nev\u011bd\u011bla jsem, co bude za rok, za p\u011bt let, ale nau\u010dila jsem se \u017e\u00edt p\u0159\u00edtomnost\u00ed. P\u0159estala jsem po\u010d\u00edtat, o co jsem p\u0159i\u0161la, a za\u010dala si v\u0161\u00edmat toho, co jsem z\u00edskala.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bylo mi sedmn\u00e1ct, kdy\u017e jsem porodila dvoj\u010data. Neud\u011blalo ze m\u011b to hned dosp\u011blou, silnou a jistou \u017eenou. Ale byl to za\u010d\u00e1tek cesty, na kter\u00e9 jsem se to v\u0161echno musela nau\u010dit. Ka\u017ed\u00fd den znovu. A i kdy\u017e byla ta cesta t\u011b\u017ek\u00e1, st\u00e1la za to, proto\u017ee m\u011b nau\u010dila milovat v\u00edc, ne\u017e jsem si kdy dok\u00e1zala p\u0159edstavit.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Bylo mi sedmn\u00e1ct, kdy\u017e jsem porodila dvoj\u010data. Ten den se mi zapsal do t\u011bla d\u0159\u00edv ne\u017e do pam\u011bti. Pamatuji si ostr\u00e9 sv\u011btlo v \n<a class=\"moretag\" href=\"https:\/\/harcum.am\/?p=3612\"> [...]<\/a>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3613,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3612","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"views":794,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3612","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3612"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3612\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3614,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3612\/revisions\/3614"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3613"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3612"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3612"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/harcum.am\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3612"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}